


Mistletoe

by Star_trekkin_across_theuniverse



Series: Human Resources [9]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: F/M, phil/anna, phil/annie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-07
Updated: 2014-12-07
Packaged: 2018-02-28 11:17:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,092
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2730413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Star_trekkin_across_theuniverse/pseuds/Star_trekkin_across_theuniverse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The holidays have arrived at SHIELD, and everyone is trying to play matchmaker for Anna. One-shot. Phil/Annie</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mistletoe

“More to the right, Annie,” Erin ordered. I shifted my weight on the step stool and tugged at the top of the tree. Jenkins wanted a damn Christmas tree in the HR office. Erin and I had argued against it. Not because either of us were Scrooge, but because SHIELD was proud of the diversity of its employees, and there simply wasn’t enough space in the HR office for decorations for all the festivals that happened in December, let alone throughout the rest of the year. Jenkins was the boss though, and so we were spending our Friday afternoon putting up the tree. It was an okay diversion from real work, but considering the woman wanted the tree up, Erin and I both felt she should be the one up the rickety ladder. When she’d refused, I’d pulled out a low step stool that was slightly more stable. But it was awkward and not quite tall enough, and my balance was very precarious.

“Now how exactly am I supposed to come into this office and not be slapped with a harassment accusation when you ladies are always presenting such temptation for me?” The voice was familiar. The context was telling. Stark had arrived. Why, I have no idea. But he was in the office while I was up a ladder in a snug fitting skirt, reaching toward the top of the tree so that my midriff was exposed. Just my luck. I looked over my shoulder to glare at him and lost my balance completely. I had two choices: take out the tree or take out Tony Stark. I opted for the one that might recover, and let myself fall back onto the billionaire.

To my surprise, he sort of caught me. He stumbled back as his arms caught me around the waist, and with a loud ‘oof’, he swung my legs free of the step stool before he lost his balance and managed to deposit us in a pile on the floor. I rolled off him, and sat up. He looked a little dazed.

“Oh god, Stark, are you okay?” The corner of his mouth turned up at one side and he raised an eyebrow.

“When I said I wanted to get my hands all over you, I don’t think that’s what I had in mind, Ms. Ellis.” He pushed himself to sitting. I rolled my eyes and used the stool to pull myself to my feet.

“You know, Stark, for a self-professed pig, you didn’t even use this as an opportunity to cop a feel,” I commented. “I don’t know whether to be insulted or flattered.”

“I didn’t exactly have the chance to think about strategic placement of my hands, but if you’d like to climb back on that stool, I could probably give us both a thrill,” he teased. Erin snorted.

“The good news, Annie? You managed to straighten that weird branch out when you fell. We can finally decorate,” she interjected.

“Oh, you should make a paper chain out of all the forms people have filed on me,” Stark suggested.

“It’s just a little tree, Mr. Stark. We’d like to be able to enjoy it, and not just the decorations,” I shot back. He feigned offense and then smiled.

“As delightful as I find all this foreplay, Ms. Ellis, I need to see your Ms. Jenkins about the next seminar. I’m speaking at a conference when she’s scheduled me.” Stark winked and brushed past me into Jenkins’ office, shutting the door behind him. I gaped at the door, slack-jawed. Foreplay? I cast a glance toward Erin and saw she was smothering her smile. My eyes narrowed.

“Foreplay?” I asked her. She burst out laughing. I rolled my eyes and stalked toward the box of decorations that Jenkins had pulled out of storage. Considering we hadn’t had a tree up in the six years I’d been at SHIELD, I had to wonder how old they were. Erin was trying to regain some self-control when I returned to the tree. I narrowed my eyes and scowled at her, but it did not have the effect I was hoping for, instead renewing the laughter. 

“I’m sorry, Annie, but when you think about it, it does play a lot like a movie trope,” she finally manage to quell her giggling enough to speak. “You know, the one. The hot guy and hot girl hate each other and are constantly bickering until they fall into a storage closet and have angry, super hot sex. All annoying and inappropriate behaviour aside, I bet he’s incredible in the sack.”

“I might have just thrown up a little in my mouth.” My skin crawled. I opened the box of decorations, and started pulling smaller boxes out of the box. Each box had a half dozen beautiful glass balls. But there were no lights. There must be another box somewhere. “Erin, did you want to go back to the storage room and look for lights, or should I?”

“You go. I’ll send Stark when he’s done with Jenkins,” Erin teased. I threw a rolled up tinsel garland at her and spun on my heel.

“You’d better be planning on buying me many eggnogs at the staff party tonight,” I snapped. I could hear her laughter follow me down the hallway.

We’d had to move quite a bit of filing to access the Christmas stuff in the back corner of the storage room, and I was glad that we hadn’t put any of it back. I headed right for where we’d found the tree and the other box. I started flipping up lids on the boxes nearby, but they were all filled with files from the pre-digital archive. It suggested to me that the late seventies was the last time the tree had been up, as all the files were from around 1977-1979. I finally struck gold and found the box with the lights. When I got back to the tree, I could hear Erin’s voice.

“No, I think that would be a B6-432F for relocation, but that’s really Anna’s area of strength. She’s like a computer the way she can remember which form is for what. The B6-432E is for travel indirectly related to relocation. I think. She should be back in a moment.” Erin was talking to someone who was blocked by the tree. It couldn’t be Stark. SHIELD wouldn’t be relocating him on their dime. I glanced toward Jenkins’ door and saw it was open, and she was looking rather frazzled. Stark was nowhere to be seen. I cleared my throat and put the box down.

“Found the lights,” I called, and walked around the edge of the tree to where she stood. 

“Ms. Ellis. You are a sight for sore eyes.” It was Coulson. I wanted to smile, but the last couple of times we’d spoken things had remained strained. It had been at least a year since the harassment seminar. I’d tried not to think about it. And then I found myself mentally correcting it in my head. It had been 18 months. Almost exactly. And I could still feel his lips against mine if I closed my eyes. I forced myself to keep them open, determined not to fall back into the same ridiculous crush I’d forced myself out of after the disaster of the seminar.

“You look well, Coulson. The West Coast has been good to you,” I offered. He smiled, and the crinkles at the corners of his eyes nearly did me in.

“It has been. But Fury has other plans for me now, and so I’m back with the East Coast division. Out of New York for now, but I think New Mexico will be coming up as a short term assignment.” He had a little tan line at his temples, a testimony to how often he wore sunglasses.

“Welcome back,” I offered lamely. It had been easy keeping him out of my thoughts when he was on the other side of the country. The challenge was going to be not falling back into old habits now that he was back.

“Are you coming to the holiday party tonight, Coulson?” Erin asked. Coulson smiled.

“The one year I missed it, Hill got drunk and wore a mistletoe headband. She ran around ordering lower level agents to kiss her. I wouldn’t miss another for the world,” he replied. I smiled.

“That’s been embellished a little over the years,” I offered. “She wasn’t drunk. That’s what made it funnier.” Coulson chuckled. It was a warm laugh, and I felt my chest tighten. I turned away. I could not go through the stupidity of an unrequited crush again. Or worse, a requited crush that was still going nowhere.

“It’ll be nice to see you there, Coulson. Will you bring your girlfriend?” Erin pressed. I could see Coulson tense in my peripheral vision, but busied myself untangling lights.

“Not exactly seeing anyone right now.” He cleared his throat and took a few steps toward me. “So, Ms. Ellis, I was wondering about relocation allowance.”

“B6-432F. I can fill it out for you if you shoot me your expense report and receipts by email. It’ll be faster that way.” I plugged a strand in and checked the bulbs. It was a bit of a cold dismissal, I admit, but I really didn’t want to look into his eyes and lose myself again. I’d finally got past everything in our history, and started dating again about six months ago. Jeremy was everything Coulson was not. He was close in age to me, he had a steady job curating a collection at the Smithsonian, which meant regular hours, and he never asked questions about work. He’d figured out very quickly that I worked for one of the intelligence organizations headquartered in DC, and just never pushed after that. But the drawback was that he was everything that Coulson was not. His kiss didn’t curl my toes, and our senses of humour were poorly matched. He was more Simpsons to my Monty Python. Jeremy was a good man, but he was bland. As a result we were casually dating, and I was not feeling any compulsion to move things forward. I wasn’t even bringing him to the Holiday party. Erin had been badgering me for weeks to just cut him loose. In her words, if I wasn’t willing to be seen at a work function with him, I just wasn’t into him. Which, according to her, wasn’t fair to him. She was right. I was just slow to move because I didn’t want to hurt him.  
“I’ll do that this afternoon. Thanks, Ms. Ellis,” Coulson replied. “Hope to see you tonight.” His shoulders slumped a little and I fought the urge to run after him and explain myself. He didn’t need me explaining anything about my emotions. He’d moved on too. Ironically, gossip flew around SHIELD. An organization entirely dedicated to keeping secrets, but the employees never stopped passing information around about one another. And I knew Coulson had been dating too. So despite the urge to chase him down and confess I don’t even know what to him, I stayed put, checking the bulbs on the tree lights.

Stark rematerialized, seemingly from thin air. And he looked surprised, which never boded well for any of us. “That was horrifically awkward,” he commented, looking from the exit to me and then back again. “It’s almost as though –“

“Mind your own business, Stark,” I snapped. His eyes widened.

“You and him? Isn’t he a robot?”

“You’re the mechanic, you tell me.” I could not find the burned out light that was preventing the second string from lighting up, and was starting to get a little rougher than I should have been with the lights.

“Don’t turn this back to me, Ellis. Are you and him,” Stark trailed off and made an obscene gesture, “you know?”

“I have never personally filed papers on you Stark, but if you don’t make yourself really fucking scarce, right fucking now, I will,” I snapped, just as I found the burned out bulb. The lights snapped on brightly, startling us both. I cocked an eyebrow, wordlessly daring him to defy me. He held up his hands in surrender and backed away.

Before he turned to leave, while his hands were still in the air, he leaned forward and winked, “You are so hot when you’re angry, Ms. Ellis.” I forced a smile while reaching down beside me. I picked up a decoration and lobbed it at Stark’s head. It shattered against the wall beside the doorjamb as he darted out of the office.

XXX

Erin sat on the edge of my bathtub, drinking some sort of pink martini while I finished applying my make-up. Whatever was in the glass was good. Cranberry maybe? Didn’t matter. I was cut off after this drink. I didn’t trust my judgment to allow myself to drink at work functions. I blotted my lipstick and tossed back the remains of the drink.

“How do I look?” I asked Erin’s reflection in the mirror. She sighed and shook her head.

“Like Holiday Barbie, honey. You look spectacular,” she teased.

“Would that I had Barbie’s waistline, it would make this flat butt look that much better,” I laughed. Erin rolled her eyes.

“You’re gorgeous, you idiot. It’s probably a good thing you aren’t bringing Jeremy. You’d never scrape him off if he saw you like this.” She downed her drink and stood up. “The cab should be here any minute. I’ll meet you down there?”

I nodded at her back and checked my hair one final time before stepping out into the hall and slipping on my shoes. I threw a wrap over my shoulders, and grabbed my purse before locking up and heading down to the cab. Erin was already seated in the back when I got in. As I pulled the door shut, the cabbie pulled away from the curb. He pulled up to the hotel in record time. Where SHIELD may have had concerns about overt displays of Christmas (at least, all of us except Jenkins did), the hotel did not. There were decorated trees on either side of the main entrance, and the lobby held a spectacular huge tree, decorated in classic gold ornaments and red ribbon, with white twinkle lights sparkling from the fragrant boughs. We made our way to the ballroom and stepped inside the most opulent false-winter-wonderland I’ve ever seen, complete with ceramic snowmen, and a false ice rink with motorized woodland creatures skating on it. A jazz band was at the front of the room, playing carols. 

Even though the snow was plastic and fake, a wave of homesickness hit me so hard I nearly swayed. I recognized few people. Erin was already at the bar, having none of my qualms about drinking at a work function. Her argument was that the SHIELD holiday party was so big that no one would notice. And that if anyone did, they’d inevitably compare whatever shenanigans were had to the year Hill made everyone kiss her, and quickly forget about whatever she’d been up to. It was the kind of logic that made me want to break down and have one more drink. So when Erin held one out to me, I pushed aside my concerns and accepted it.

“I will not be dancing on speakers and singing angry break up music tonight, Erin,” I warned her when she winked knowingly at me. Despite my hesitation about her motives, I followed her to a table near the dance floor. She immediately set out scoping the crowd, reminding me, as she finished her drink, that SHIELD was a ‘target rich environment’. I cringed and stayed seated with my nearly full drink when she headed back to the bar. A young guy I thought I recognized from security sat down in the seat next to me.

“Ellis, right?” He asked.

“Yeah. I’m sorry, I don’t remember –“

“Kevin. Kevin Carlisle. From Security,” he offered and then cringed. “I’m sorry, I’m not good that this.”

“You’re fine, Kevin. Kevin Carlisle. Kevin Carlisle from Security,” I teased. He flushed. He was kind of cute. But young. Younger than Jeremy even. Probably too young for me. But he was cute. Erin leaned over my shoulder and smiled.

“Well, hi there. I’m Erin. You’ve obviously met Annie,” she held out her hand.

“Kevin,” he reiterated as he shook Erin’s hand. She was carrying a couple of drinks.

“You need to speed up if you’re going to keep up, Annie,” she chastised. I laughed.

“Oh no. I already told you. Two is plenty,” I shook my head.

“Oh, come on. Don’t be such a stick in the mud. Kevin looks like a nice Christmas mistake to make, doesn’t he?” She winked at Kevin, who, if it was possible, blushed even more than he had already been blushing.

“And with that charming introduction, I don’t suppose I could convince you to dance?” I tilted my head toward the dance floor. Kevin glanced at it. There were only a few people out there dancing, but more and more people were starting to move in that direction. He looked back at me, and then to Erin and nodded.

“That could be nice,” he agreed and rose to lead me out onto the dance floor. The band struck up a new song and Kevin placed his hand firmly at my waist. “I’m sorry. I don’t want you to think I was trying to pick you up.”

“Why not?” I asked. He stopped moving for a second and quickly regained the tempo of the song before he answered.

“I, uh, well –“

“Erin has that effect on men,” I laughed. “Don’t worry about it. I didn’t think you’d sat down with the sole intent of taking me home.”

“In the interest of keeping with the holiday spirit, I would be lying if I said I’m not interested. But I was thinking more along the lines of drinks before holiday mistakes,” he admitted. I respected his honesty, but the guy had only ever spoken to me five or six times in passing. So he was interested in the package, not the rest of me. And that had been a turn off since ninth grade. He didn’t notice the way my jaw involuntarily clenched with his comment, and I was trying hard to relax it so that he wouldn’t notice. When the song ended, I rejoined Erin. And Erin, who could read me like I was a toddler’s book, immediately steered us toward the bathroom, effectively ditching Kevin.

“Lemme guess. More interested in the sweater puppies than you?” She asked as she reapplied her lipstick. I sighed.

“I know I’m being picky. But I don’t want to wind up with a guy who saw my boobs and didn’t see anything else,” I shrugged. “Particularly not at work.”

“Honey, every man you ever meet is going to notice the twins first. And that’s okay. You want a man with discretion at least. Who doesn’t only notice them, and who likes other things about you. Kevin seemed awful young anyhow. Fresh from the academy, right?” She steered us back toward the bar. I supposed one more drink wouldn’t hurt, since I’d left half of my last one at the table before Kevin and I had danced.

“I don’t think he would have been more than twenty-three,” I agreed.

“There’s plenty of other fish in the sea. Like I keep telling you, SHIELD is a target rich environment.” She turned away from the bar and gestured grandly across the ballroom. It had filled quite a bit in the few minutes we’d been in the bathroom. Agent Hill pointed at us from a few feet away.

“Ladies!” She was wearing impossibly high heels and was so graceful that I felt a tug of jealousy. I had worn some amazing shoes in my life, but nothing as amazing as what was on her feet. And I’d always been clumsy, sort of. “I’m always glad to see you two out. Jenkins never comes to these functions, and I think they’re good for group morale. In her absence, you can be the de facto department heads. Just for tonight.”

“I think she was planning on coming tonight, but she didn’t like the way Annie decorated the tree. When we left, she was taking all the lights off so she could start again,” Erin offered.

“She finally bullied someone into letting her put that haggard old thing up? Fury swore last year he was going to destroy the damn tree so he wouldn’t have to decline the request again this year,” Hill laughed. I snorted in contempt.

“She just didn’t bother with a request this year, and instead demanded we deal with it this afternoon,” I clarified, to Hill’s increased laughter.

“Myra Jenkins doesn’t have an insubordinate bone in her body. I wonder what’s gotten into her?” She pondered. We made our way through the appetizer buffet and found a new table, continuing to talk shop. Hill was one of the good agents, who didn’t treat the office staff like we were somehow less than she was. Of course, she understood exactly how high our clearances went, and what information we were privy to, so we’d earned her respect along the way.

“I hung mistletoe this year,” she admitted suddenly. I choked on my eggnog.

“Why?” I stammered. “And where is it? I don’t want to be caught near it.” Hill laughed again.

“Because we live and die by that A2-336E, and this is a holiday party. Sometimes a stolen kiss is okay,” she shrugged. “Also, I have a new Taser and I think it would be nice to try it on someone who decides to steal a kiss from a non-consenting party.”

“Oh, and Stark wasn’t invited, was he?” Erin teased. I laughed again. “Annie, go hang out under the mistletoe so Maria can tase half of SHIELD. Well. All of SHIELD. Except for –“

“Shut up, Erin.” My tone was cold. Hill cocked an eyebrow at me.

“Except for who? Whom? Whatever, Who’s the One Person at SHIELD?” Hill was curious. That was a never a good thing.

“There isn’t one. I don’t do the work romance thing.” Technically it wasn’t a lie. I hadn’t since Jack and that was ancient history. Hill looked to Erin for the answer. I shot Erin a warning look.

“I can’t say, Maria. You’re scary, but Annie knows about 34 ways to kill me.”

“And if I knew thirty-five?” Hill prompted. Erin bit her lip and glanced back at me.

“She knows my deepest fears. She is scarier.” Erin admitted. I smiled in triumph at Hill who rolled her eyes and looked over my shoulder. She broke into a broad smile and waved at someone. I turned around to see who she was gesturing at to join us and inwardly cringed. Erin burst out laughing. Of course Coulson was headed toward us. He and Hill had an awesome working relationship.

“Phil, you look,” Hill paused, “like you just left the office. Wait. You changed your tie for a fancy dress up tie, didn’t you?” She fixed the knot a little and smirked. Coulson set his lips in a thin line and shook his head.

“We can’t all throw on little black dresses for formal events. Some of us don’t have the legs for it,” Coulson’s response was dry, and I bit back a bubble of amusement. Erin, who was three drinks ahead of me, did not. Her laugh exploded out of her. I leaned back and narrowed my eyes.

“I don’t know, Coulson, I think you could pull off a pair of heels.” I fought to hide the smile. He raised an eyebrow in question. I deserved it after being so dismissive earlier. Hill’s eyes narrowed and she glanced at Erin, who nodded. Hill smiled like the cat who’d caught the canary, and I knew she was making plans for me to land under the mistletoe with Coulson.

“Phil, what level are you these days?” She asked. 

“Seven. Why?”

“I’m an Eight. I’m going to suggest you ask Anna to dance,” she said, reaching into her purse.

“And if she says no?” Coulson pressed.

“Well, even though she technically has higher clearance than I do, administrative staff ultimately answer to Fury. And when he is absent, they answer to me. And since he is not here,” she trailed off, looking expectantly at me.

“I had no plans to say no, Maria.” I handed my drink to Erin and turned to face Coulson. He sighed and looked from Hill to me.

“Well, Ms. Ellis, I think we’ve been issued a command from Deputy-Director Hill.” He held out his hand. “If I can have your permission to escort you out to dance?” I couldn’t help but smile.

“I would be happy to join you on the dance floor, Agent Coulson,” I agreed, and took his hand. He slipped his other hand behind my elbow and with the atmosphere and the live band, I almost felt like I was in an old romantic movie. Coulson even fit the classic male lead role. I felt a pinch in my chest for what couldn’t happen. The pinch got worse when he put his arms around me, and with it, my frustration increased. I had worked so hard to get past whatever it was I felt for him. I technically even had a boyfriend, plans to dump him notwithstanding. And as soon as his hand was at my waist, I felt every single confused emotion I’d ever felt about Phil Coulson well back up to the surface.

“You look stunning, Anna.” His blue eyes were fixed on mine. I smiled, softening further.

“Détente then, Phil?” I asked.

“I didn’t realize we were at conflict.” His smile turned sad.

“I am always conflicted where you are concerned,” I admitted.

“I’m sorry, but I have to ask,” he shook his head. “Where does Jeremy fit into this?” I let out a short bark of laughter.

“Wow, SHIELD is even worse than I’d expected. Jeremy is complicated,” I admitted. “He was a means to an end. Which makes me sound like a terrible person, but I had some very complex emotions to work through, and he fit the bill. He’s brilliant, and engaging as a conversationalist, but bland. Not terribly exciting.”

“Sounds safe.” The way he said it was not insulting.

“I find I’m not terribly content with safe,” I admitted. We continued dancing in silence for a while. “I have a question for you. I am somewhat emboldened by the application of alcohol. You’ve been warned.”

“Okay?” If it was possible for Coulson to sound nervous, he did.

“We’ve established that there is mutual interest here, so we don’t need to go over that, but I’m just curious about what you first found attractive about me,” I asked. “I know, it’s awkward and probably really inappropri-“

“Your laugh,” he interrupted.

“My laugh?” I was dumbfounded.

“It’s got a husky quality to it. And you laugh at the right things,” he clarified.

“Coulson, the first time we met –“

“Ellis, you’re a stunning woman. But there are a lot of beautiful women in the world. I find intellect and personality much more attractive,” he interrupted a second time, and I thought maybe his hand squeezed my waist. Either way, I got a chill. I sighed and closed the gap between us. 

“Remind me again why this can’t happen,” I demanded. That weird flutter in my chest was back, and it had been so long since I’d felt it like that. Coulson sighed, the hand at my waist spreading out, his fingers digging into the flesh on my back.

“You advise against intra-office entanglements in your harassment seminar, Anna.” His voice was low. I opened my mouth to protest and he shook his head. “Let me finish. We’ve argued about this before. There’s no predictability to my schedule, I work in a dangerous line of work, and I –“

I kissed him. I couldn’t stop myself. I don’t know if it was the holiday music, too much eggnog, pent up frustration, or just plain nervy. But I kissed him. I leaned forward and placed my lips against his and honestly, I wasn’t strong enough to hold him against me. And he wasn’t going anywhere. In fact, he dropped my hand and dragged his fingers down the side of my ribs, settling at my hip. My free hand came up to his jaw. The flutter in my chest got worse and I pulled away, dragging in a deep breath. There was just too much at stake. With a sudden and disturbing clarity, I understood what he’d been saying. If this was my response to his touch and we were just work acquaintances, what would happen if we got together and then something happened to him? What would I do with myself? How could I ever cope?

“Anymore like that and I’ll never get you out of my system.” The words rushed out on the exhale. Coulson smiled, one corner of his mouth tilting up.

“You never fail to make me question my choices.” He shook his head, never once breaking eye contact. 

“But you’re right, Coulson. We can’t do this. I get it.” I took both his hands into mine and looked down at them. “I would like to start over with you. Please. Can we just go back to being work friends? Professional, distant, polite?”

“Of course,” he nodded. He opened his mouth to say something else and his phone rang. He pulled it from his breast pocket and looked at the screen, and cringed. “I’m sorry, Ms. Ellis. I have to take this call.”

“Have a wonderful new year, Agent Coulson.” I nodded. He pressed a button on his phone and answered and I turned to walk away, unwilling to hear anything that might compromise an assignment.

“Yes, of course, but can you hold on just one moment?” I heard him say into the phone. He grabbed my arm and turned me back to face him. “Please find someone amazing. Don’t settle for less than you deserve. Jeremy is a dud.” He kissed my cheek, and turned away, heading for the main doors. 

I was left staring as he left. And then I found Erin and lifted my eggnog moratorium. It was time to get drunk, have a good time, and move on.


End file.
